So, You’re Questioning!

Welcome to the inaugural post in our new series, So, You’re Questioning!,  where we’ll do our best to address any lingering queries you may have about the SYP universe, from the perspective of the characters within it.

We’re kicking things off with a fan submission to that roguish imp, Vex.

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Q. “Is Vex aware of human fiction and what does he think about how demons and such are presented in it?”

A. Oh, dear Monkey, my kind really has acquired a bad reputation from yours over the centuries, haven’t we? It’s hard NOT to be aware when humans have passed down countless stories and books. And have you seen the artwork!? Hieronymus Bosch had serious issues and some 21st century primitive pounding at a keyboard keeps the stereotypes going with a Pinterest page, of all things. Ugh, humanity. But you’ve got it all wrong. Well, mostly wrong. Maybe.

Hey, I know that guy! He still owes me $20.

Sure, a demon might give you nightmares or bad luck, possibly wither a field of crops or ease the spread of an epidemic from time to time (Guilty! I mean, who hasn’t at one point, am I right?). Yet, when it comes to problems, you monkeys don’t give yourselves nearly enough credit. Despite what you might have heard, we aren’t usually in the habit of getting into legal entanglements, asking you to pledge your unyielding service to Satan in exchange for witchy powers or sending telepathic messages to mass murderers, what have you. That shit is all in your poor, delusional heads, sometimes just to stick it to each other or cast blame where there is none. To which I say, bravo! Your imaginations are far more creative than we could ever hope to be. True Hell really is other humans.

1490s Germany: Awful parents try to force grotesque urchin onto poor, overworked demon with no prior child care experience, in exchange for a sexier harvest or something.

See, here’s the thing that so many mortals have yet to figure out: we are literally what you’ve made us. Our natures and purpose have evolved alongside you. Before you monkeys came into your own, we had nothing else to do! We existed in a shadow vacuum, balanced with the light. It was YOUR fear, anger, lust, suspicion, envy, greed, selfishness, and pettiness on earth that threw everything into chaos and opened the door for ideas and opportunity. All we did was take advantage of a lucrative job market. That humans turned around and made up even worse stories about us while perpetrating their own devious crimes is just the delicious icing on the irony cake.

Oh, and don’t think angels are off the hook, either. They aren’t precious guardians awaiting your pitiful pleas for help, these are fierce wardens who consider themselves nigh infallible. Those laser-guided bird brains are total hypocrites. At least demons like me keep it real. Well, mostly. Maybe.

Good Omens is my jam, though.

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